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Don’t Trust Your Feelings

Posted by Freeman Michaels on August 12th, 2010 at 10:18am

We have all been told to “trust our feelings”, but for many of us this advice is not entirely wise. The reason is because growing up our feelings were misunderstood and misinterpreted and we never developed a healthy emotional sense of ourselves. In childhood, many of us were taught to judge our feelings – certain feelings may have been acceptable, while others may have been deemed “bad”. Feelings are not good or bad, they are just information. When feelings are allowed a healthy expression they are a vital part of our lives. However, when feelings are repressed, denied, and or judged they often get expressed in destructive patterns of behavior. Compulsive eating and binge eating are unhealthy expressions of emotion.

Many people grow up in families where feelings get distorted and where there is no healthy expression of feelings. Children learn very early on what feelings are permitted and what feelings must be repressed. Kids pick up ways in which their emotions can be used to manipulate situations to get needs met. Very few of us were blessed with healthy modeling of emotional expression.

A significant portion of the work that I do with my weight release clients involves helping them observe and express their feelings in a healthy and constructive manner. I teach them to interrupt the emotional ride that they are prone to “going on”. I teach them to relate to their emotional experience with a sense of compassion – seeking to better understand how they feel and why. I help them find new and healthier ways to experience and express feelings.

Ultimately, in order to be a functioning, fulfilled adult we must have a healthy relationship with our feelings which must include healthy outlets for emotional expression. For many of us we must learn how to “trust our feelings”.

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Freeman Michaels is America’s #1 weight release expert and coach. He is the author of Weight Release: A Liberating Journey. His groundbreaking program uses personal development principles to end the “diet cycle” and help people release weight forever.